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It seems that everybody these days is talking about self-care or self-love. I mean, who hasn’t heard the saying, you can’t love another person until you love yourself first? But what does it mean to love yourself?
What is self-love? And how does one measure to know that they are loving themselves enough? Is self-love a certain level of confidence or physical wellness? Or is it a level of mindfulness and spirituality? It’s all so very elusive.
Maybe that’s because self-love means different things to different people. I think it’s more than just the things that fill us up and make us feel good. I mean, I always feel great when I leave the salon, but I don’t think you can achieve self-love and appreciation through getting your hair done.
What about going to get a massage? A massage is the act of investing time into yourself to release tension and stress which ultimately makes you feel better overall. That MUST be self-love, right? One could argue that a massage falls under self-care more than it does self-love. (But I DO think it’s part of it)
You see, self-love is about more than just feeling good; it’s dynamic. Self-Love is about having appreciation for oneself while growing physically, psychologically and spiritually. It’s a trifecta of sorts. All equally important.
Here are 5 ways that you can start giving yourself a little more love:
- Become Mindful – Take note of what you think, how you feel and what you want. This can be in general or in a specific situation. The more in-tune you are with these things, the better understanding you will have of who you are. I like to quickly journal these at the end of the day.
- Hold Gratitude – Appreciate who you are and what you have and all the things that you are capable of. This is another part of my evening jottings in my journal. What I’ve come to find is that even in the hardest of times, looking back, I was able to stay the course by being thankful for the life experience and the example that I am resilient.
- Care for yourself – It’s important to listen to your body when it’s telling you it needs support. Healthy outlets such as nutrition and exercise have obvious benefits but you can also nourish yourself through intimacy and getting regular sleep. And yes, getting that massage won’t do you any harm. 😉
- Quit blaming yourself – I know that you’ve been told your entire life that you need to take responsibility for your own actions but we’ve gone a little too far if you ask me. You do not need to punish yourself for mistakes that you can learn and grow from. Appreciate the learning experience and implement new strategies to grow from it.
- Live with intention – You will find that once you implement the four tips above, you will begin to live intentionally. Decisions will come easier once you know what you want and when it is clear of what you are working towards. As you start to accomplish things, you will love yourself more for it. Unfortunately, situations or people that collide with your intentions are obstacles. In the case of people, you may need to set boundaries with them if they are to remain close to you. Otherwise, you will need to side-step them in order to keep moving forward.
Through self-love we become self-aware and compassionate towards ourselves, and our own shortcomings. Our life purpose and values become more clear to us and we begin to expect fulfillment through our own efforts, not those of others.
It is true when they say that you can only love someone else as much as you love yourself. And when you DO start to love yourself, you will begin to attract people who also invest in themselves and who support your well-being naturally.
